I am also a 'Jekyll and Hyde' drinker. when I drink enough to reach blackout stage, I am unpredictable and rage seems to be the only emotion I express. I have gotten myself in dangerous situations, arrested multiple times, and have suffered gruesome injuries while blackout drunk. I also seem to start fights for no reason. I'm am lucky I haven't had my a** kicked.
Alcohol and us are just not compatible. We just have to accept that