This is like reading two books at once, which I often did when I was a kid and now that I'm sober I find that I can keep up with both conversations!
Cow, you know yourself best. We can all say what we would do but you know that it comes down to what you honestly think is best for you. I think if you can set some parameters (10 hours/day not 12 OR 12 hours are ok as long as you can go hide if you need to OR whatever will make this thing safe for you), then you have the control and that potentially changes your decision. On the other hand, if it's going to be a sweatshop experience, that sounds like too much right now. Not sure how I feel about the "relevance" argument aside from aren't you working right now? It's not like you dropped off the face of the earth...
Walk, I'm taking Antabuse as well and am somewhat torn about it. But I don't know why and I don't know why you should be either. I think it does the same thing for me that it does for you - it takes the option of drinking clean off the table. It may be the placebo affect, but who cares? It works, and it helps me to disregard any thoughts of drinking that cross my mind.
I actually came home tonight thinking about this and will probably go on a rant on my own thread, but here's the nugget of it for me: In order to stay sober, everyone needs
something. Some people have their own internal commitment to self, some have a higher power, others are on probation and don't want to get caught, etc. Why is taking Antabuse any less of a good solution if it works? (I'm not asking you that, Walk, but the others. If you know why it's less good than I'm interested in your response too.
)
I'm not saying it's a long-term solution - how can I know that? But I do know that it works for me now and there is apparently no harm as long as I don't drink. Maybe in a week or a month or a year I won't feel like I "need" it, but maybe I'll find that I "need" a different higher power at that time. Mox-nix (it's that how spelled?).