It was a long time ago, but I did the same thing. I had to get out - staying wasn't good for our children or me (or him). I do remember all of my friends, family and close co-workers all talked and asked about divorce and when was I filing. I remember feeling I wasn't ready to file - I know there could be financial implications if he was in an accident, but I just wasn't ready. So, I told myself "I don't have to to get divorced today, so I am not going to" and that was my attitude for many months and it helped relieve some pressure as I adjusted to our new lives without him. I eventually did end up filing. My husband got worse when we separated. Way worse. I felt guilty, but I had the support of this place (under a different name at that time) and I started going to Al-Anon meetings. I felt peaceful for the first time in years. The thought of them not having their dad around made me anxious and question my decision, but once I separated I could see they were better off as well. He almost died a couple times during that time. It was very difficult, but I had to stick to my decision as I was done living in crazy town and accepting the unacceptable. I accepted MANY unacceptable things, and not just his behavior, but my own. I have known others that have been in "our" boat too, and their spouses have gotten worse once they left. So, remember he may get worse but that doesn't mean you need to go back to crazy town, it probably means you should avoid it at all costs. Glad you have had made the decision to leave crazy town too. It will be best for you and your children. I got out of crazy town about 12 years ago, although I do find myself visiting occasionally, but try to make it a very short visit. Take care, and enjoy some peace in your life... you and your children deserve it!