Tx-I understand fully where you are at. Fully. You have made the best decision for your kids-and yourself. I know just how difficult it is. And I know the feeling of loving the person he once was, not who he is now. Have you spoken to a lawyer? (I can't recall from your posts). Please do whatever you need to keep your kids safe going forward-I also know how tormenting that can be-as staying in the abusive relationship at least gives you some sense of control and being able to oversee your children. Btw, it took me years to say the word "abuse" and understand that's what I was dealing with-abusers are masters at making you feel it was your fault, to get you to buy into the hope and false promises. Big hugs-you WILL be okay!
P.s. My ex was the same way-he couldn't have cared less when I finally called the police to get him removed. He told me a few days later that he never thought he would hear from me again-and that was fine with him. Yes, his first relationship was with alcohol, not me or his children. Leave him to his own devices-you will be ok.
Please get some protection for yourself and your kids-as you push forward with the divorce he will most likely become more unglued and mentally unhinged. Please get some protection-his history of abuse shows what he's capable of.