For me the stop process included not falsely fantasizing about what the relationship was. While going through the break up my recollections were always distortions of "HOW GREAT" (not) the relationship had been. In truth it was a fantasy of what I wished it to be, not what it actually was.
If it had been so great why did it end? It wasn't great. It was a whole lot of awful with flakes of "great" mostly in the beginning. Its a coping mechanism to make yourself feel better for eating a sh!t sandwich for so long.....at least that's the realization I came to.