Just thought I would update. Last night I overdosed and collapsed out the front of a supermarket. I woke in the hospital like an hour later with a tube in my nose, pulled it out along with the iv and ran from there.
I don't know why I did such a stupid thing. I felt like a doctor was patronising me. My head is very clouded and I'm not functioning well. It's like part of me has shut down. I'm on a blind autopilot.
Tomorrow I'm supposed to vacate my place. I called my parents before all this happened and I must have been pretty messed up because their advice was to go to rehab. You can't come here in this state etc etc. I was in no state to plead or argue. Fair enough...
So tomorrow as I wake to my first day of homelessness I am going to see the salvos in town and hopefully get into a detox just to start this off. I have lost control and I want it back