Welcome Grambo, the solution is quite simple, yet very hard to execute. And that is to stop drinking. There are many people on this forum that have had a long time sober, and they all started the same way. Day 1 without drinking. Beyond that is a bit different for everyone. Very sorry to hear about the issues you are dealing with. My only advice would be to get yourself straightened our first, then tackle the issues with your son. It sounds like you've been through a lot already. Wish you the very best.