Awesome job on Day 5!
Throughout your various posts, it doesn't sound to me like your current romance is helping you much in terms of quality of life, self-esteem, and definitely NOT SOBRIETY. I know from experience it's easier said than done, but I think you'd see yourself, your life, and your addiction more clearly if you could set aside the relationship drama for a little while.
Women have a much easier time focusing on themselves when they're not worrying about a guy.
So there, I've officially spoken out of school, but that's just what jumps out at me from your posts. It's just an observation.