Welcome, sammy. So sorry to hear you're going through this, but there's many people here who know all too well what it's like, so you are not alone. Addiction can be a longrollercoaster ride. It's up to you (and all of us) how long we choose to ride. Have you looked into seeing a medical professional who you can talk to? Just having typed this out has helped I'm sure. You, like the rest of us, need someone you can talk to who can help you sort through your thoughts and feelings.
Has your boyfriend sought treatment recently? Has he tried being a part of a recovery community like AA? Sounds like he's not going to conquer this on his own.
Wishing you and your girls the best!