What do I do now. I'm trying so hard to focus on myself for the first time in my life but as a single mom it's hard.
Welcome to SR, I'm sorry for the heartache that brought you here.
I haven't had time to get to know you but reading your posts tends to make me think this is a toxic relalationship, bad from the start...but perhap you feel the need for some kind of relationship to fill the void left by your ex? There is nothing good happening here, he has told you he wants space and it's not healthy to try to track him down or even to try to change him in any way.
This might be a good time to heal all your wounds, from the breakup and from the unhealthy way this has affected you.
There is a very good fellowship called CoDA (Codependents Anonymous), which is a 12 step program similar to Al-anon and Nar-anon but which may be the better choice because it does a lot of work on healing ourselves and learning healthy behaviours for living our lives...whether or not we have a loved one who is addicted or alcoholic.
It was my fellowship for almost 10 years, until I moved away from the area, but what I learned there has served me well in all aspects of my life.
Also, there is a wonderful book called Codependent No More by Melodie Beatty that I highly recommend. It has helped many of us here figure out why we are the way we are and what we can do to make healthy choices in our lives.
I'm glad you found us and hope you stick around. You are not alone here and others will be along to share their own experience, strength and hope with you too.
Hugs