I just want to send you a hug. You sound a lot like me (business head takes over and gets everything figured out)...
But putting yourself out there after a repetitive cheating situation (in my mind another form of addiction feeding a black hole of self worth) to trust again and start building a new life again...
And then this. It just really stinks. I have no doubt you'll be fine whatever comes, I'm just so sorry you have to go through it.
Stay strong with your ultimatum.