Originally Posted by
walkbeformakrun 
It sounds to me like your value system is set strongly against drinking. To try to maintain a relationship with someone who drinks will bring you pain. It would be unfair/unrealistic of you to expect him to change. Either you need to change your value system, probably not a good idea, or you need to leave this relationship.
No hard feelings need be conveyed. Its just incompatible. Like if one of you wanted to have children and the other did not.
Eh, I think that's a bit drastic. I'm sure we can work things out if there are people here who are dealing with the same just fine. It's not like I'm a vegetarian with a butcher boyfriend.
If he wanted to drink every week then yeah I would suggest we are not going to work out. But once every 2 months should be fine. I think your view of the situation is slightly reversed. He's almost never drank since we've been together, and he knew going into the relationship that I'm anti-alcohol, and we are fine just like that. But I wanted to read here about advice on how to relax myself more so he can go drink a few times without me freaking out. If I vito'd alcohol he would be fine with that, but I want to make him happy by being OK with it more, especially if you consider spending your life together.
Not to mention that alcohol is everywhere. Friends. Family. Public places. It doesn't help anyone to focus on the hatred for it. Actually, I think my focus on it is partially thanks to my "supportive family" who reminds me daily not to drink (I've got it, thanks), but I digress.
Just like smoking. I used to smoke. I haven't for a year. I hate smoking, but I don't focus on it. Someone wants to smoke? Cool, go ahead, just don't get it on my clothes.