Hi J - it's so good to have you join us. We all understand what you're going through.
I felt the same after my first encounter with alcohol. Thought it was a great way to cope with my shyness & self-consciousness. I didn't realize it was slowly stealing my spirit. In the end, I drank all day - completely dependent. When I found SR my anxiety was lessened by being among those who cared and wanted to help. I hope you'll feel the same. You can do it, J. !