This is a definite eye opener for me in terms of how much work I have to do on my resentments...
Ive never been the vindictive type but facing the opportunity to give that opportunity for it, up, Im finding it hard.
There is a big part of my self esteem that believes all the blame and insults and name calling he's showered me with forever... He still does it-- and my emotional brain is telling me that a court hearing in which he is slammed for his crap, will prove to the community and all those who believe his lies, what the truth is after all...
Oh one key piece to this settlement is that I am agreeing to this being filed under a no fault basis vs. the divorce being granted on the grounds of his alcoholism (which is a fault basis in my state)...
I consulted with a lawyer who told me that makes little long term difference, but again, emotionally, it matters to me bc that IS the basis for this divorce...