Boundaries are the invisible forcefield that protect my sanity and my serenity. I had a few, like "I won't drive you around if you've been drinking." For the situation I was in, those baby boundaries were like a band aid on an amputated leg. They were never going to achieve anything except to make me a target for his escalating abuse. The only boundary that was truly effective for me was "I will not live in a home with active alcoholism/addiction." Once I enforced that one (by moving 750 miles away from Crazytown, USA) my life improved dramatically.