Originally Posted by OpenTuning

I'm not sure if Taking the Fifth counts as honesty, but close enough

The thing is, it's become increasingly clear to me that what we've all been trying to help you do, and what you're actually trying to do, are two different things.

I can offer no advice and help in becoming a normal moderate drinker. I tried that for the last 3 years of my 35 year drinking career, and while it worked a lot of the time, in the sense of sticking to the weekly totals I set myself, it didn't work all the time. And when it went wrong, it went really, really wrong. So I certainly wasn't successful at it. And it was hard work. Mentally draining. And ultimately I quit because I was just plain sick of letting alcohol consume so much of my life and thinking, and of the completely unnecessary damage it was doing. And my life is much better as a result.

I hope you'll change your mind and try quitting instead. I found it a huge relief when I was finally ready to make my Big Plan and know that I do not drink, and will never drink again. So, so much easier than constantly negotiating with my AV over when and how much I was going to allow myself to drink. I look forward to hopefully seeing a thread started by you announcing that you've finally chosen sobriety. Now that would be something to celebrate (with something non alcoholic of course).