It's hard to stay sober. Do must do your best to enjoy every bit of sobriety so you can compare that awesome feeling to the misery of drunkenness and withdrawals.... You will remember which to choose when the challenge presents itself. Patricia, it sounds as though drinking is your way of forfeiting the conflict. You will be so much stronger in your soberness. You can overcome more. I hope you feel better. Good luck!
"A healthy attitude is contagious but don't wait to catch it from others. Be a carrier."~Tom Stoppard