It seems to other people that you are reaching out asking for help and advice. That goes for the people you meet on SR and in real life in Perth. When people encourage you to accept medical help you interpret this as people forcing you to do things you don't want to do.
Previously when you have got drunk it has set off a series of bad consequences including a broken arm. If you drink again now, rather than providing a respite from all the anxiety associated with ill health and injury it will make it worse.
We know about abstinence because we are trying it out. It is not easy but the consequences of drinking were worse.