Welcome. I think many of us here spent many years trading one addictive behaviour and obsession for another. Food; drink; gambling; spending; sex; relationships; etc. etc. etc. Mostly they end up making our lives unmanageable one way or another. Finally we start to see the 'Ism' in ourselves, and can learnt to find other ways of dealing with life on life's terms (learn acceptance) rather than seek comfort in unhealthy and destructive ways.
It can feel like the end, but you know, this CAN be the beginning. I've been sober for 21 (almost 22) months and have been working the 12-step program of recovery through AA, and am learning better ways of thinking about and dealing with things, and can honestly say that I have never been happier in myself than I am today.
So glad you found this forum - it has been a fantastic source of information and support for me and many, many others. Wishing you well on your journey of recovery, towards peace, joy and serenity.