I haven't been in your shoes. But, I'll give you my thoughts based on other experiences: I don't think you're being selfish - what a burden you must be feeling. There isn't anything you can do or could've done. You couldn't have sobered her up, only she had the ability to do that. When you have had time to process all of this, you might want to go visit. Right now, you need to take care of yourself - she is being looked after. My very best to you.