Updating
Hey guys
429 days here no alcohol.
Thought I'd post in mental health as it's mainly mental health issues that I feel limit me at present.
I've had a turbulent year with regards to anti depressants. I've been on 3 different ones, citalopram, venlafaxine and now sertraline and to be honest and unfortunately I'm still not really able to confidently say I'm "recovering" from depression, anxiety and intrusive thoughts.
The festive period is here and things seem to slow down for me, time stands still for a bit. I'm working on Christmas Day this year.
The difference this year is I am at work, this time last year I'd signed myself off sick and ended up being off for 4 1/2 months. I do not feel I'm myself anymore, my confidence is very very low and I've still got a lot of social anxiety at work and home life. The intrusive thoughts are present daily and I'm trying to implement what I learnt at the CBT sessions I've previously had. I'm binge eating at the moment and have been for to be honest on and off all year.
I haven't really got anyone in the "real world" I talk to about depression, anxiety or intrusive thoughts. The content of the intrusive thoughts makes it difficult to discuss with anyone. Someone who hasn't suffered would most likely interpret what I was talking about in the wrong manner, advise me and most likely make matters unintentionally worse. Besides, everyone has there own things to deal with and there own problems. This time of year magnifies how self absorbed everyone actually is most likely including myself to be honest.
I don't really know what to do next, I've had CBT and it didn't go so well second time around, last time I spoke to the GP they advised stay on the sertraline 100mg for a while (been 6 weeks at that dose so far). Work is no better.
This is my reality sober folks. I'm pleased I'm sober but I really don't feel I'm making much progress anywhere else