Endless, I thought I "got it" when I started here but at long last figured out that this was truly life or death for me. For a long time I had some kind of internal disconnect between what my mind knew I needed to do and what I was actually willing to do. Somehow I thought that once I truly "made up my mind" that I could simply do it. Maybe some people can. I couldn't. When I finally went to IOP, my resolve got stronger as I stayed sober longer (the old chicken-and-egg thing). So for me, putting myself in a situation where I absolutely didn't feel I could drink (I was told that I probably needed inpatient rehab) was enough to get me past the early months.
Your thoughts about working the steps may well be something similar - a goal to hang onto to both get you through the early months and also an aid in helping you internalize the messages about alcoholism.
I wish you long life and happiness!