Originally Posted by
LexieCat 
I know, it made me a little uncomfortable, too. Especially since nobody else seemed especially distressed about it, especially Liz.
And the idea of someone "calling me out" when I behave a certain way is troubling, too.
Be careful, Liz, that you aren't concentrating on pleasing him by not pleasing others. I don't necessarily see him as a control freak just because he made an observation, but just remember it's OK to say, "Thanks for the input, but I'm fine with my behavior."
Thanks guys. Very important to remember. And, fyi, I didn't feel like he was telling me how to act. He was asking me to just be ME and not to try so hard at pleasing him. His premise was: I'm here, I care about you, I like you for you, so stop working over time and just let yourself be you. I didn't get the feeling that he was treating me like a child or asking me to do something I was uncomfortable with or even controlling me. I felt genuine sincerity and caring coming from him.
Also, I did defend myself and told him that I felt that I was always honest with him about who I am and that if he felt I was trying too hard that maybe his interpretation was skewed. It's not like I sat there and just smiled nicely and said, "Gee, thanks." I did thank him but that was after I said my peace.
We've been together for 8 months and I don't see him as controlling or manipulative. He does say whatever pops into his head and he definitely marches to the beat of his own drummer, but he's been up front about who he is from date number 1. I have a choice to use this as a lesson for growth. If he continues down this path, then I'll have a problem and may need to move on. But, this was the first time this has come up and so I'll take it as a chance to learn and to evaluate whether he's off his rocker or whether it's me.