Thanks for the encouragement you guys, yes I have given what Itchy said a lot of thought. I've always known that I tend to blow things out of proportion, and that things usually do turn out fine and totally not worth all the stress I gave it. It was good to have someone point it out so: thanks Itchy. I'm really going to try to have more faith in myself from now on, just that I can handle situations better than I think I can.
Mags---I completely empathize with you about the drinking thoughts, I get those too, quite often around Christmas, actually. I miss me some coffee with baileys which turned into coffee and whiskey which turned into just whiskey. Etc. The holidays are a big trigger for me. Used to have pretty much a constant buzz on all December. And New Year's Eve parties that are just a haze of drinking as much as possible. So like you Mags, writing it down makes me realize what a right decision I made by not drinking. I'm off that constant crazy rollercoaster of drunk, depressed, craving, drunk.
Now we actually get to enjoy our lives and be present in them, not just messed up bystanders along for the ride, barely participating. Even when I seemed like I was enjoying myself I was always just in my own head.
I'm getting better at talking and connecting with people, out of necessity, because that's what you have to do when you're not wasted. Or else sit there like a lump. I'm proud that my social skills, which used to be atrocious, are getting better.
Petals glad you had a nice night out. I love those little moments of sobriety giddiness. Like little gifts just for you.
FBL-the fact that you both got to see each other's recovery is such a gift. It must have made him so happy and proud to see you follow in his footsteps, and you got to share that. Thinking about you and your dad today.
One more day till my holiday. Yeah I'm excited. I almost, almost, wish I could stay here and just relax at my place and enjoy the nature. But, I can't wait to spend Christmas with the fam. Last year we were all apart, so it's been two years since we've been together on Christmas.
Have a good Friday!
