Originally Posted by
teatreeoil007 
Thanks for your post and bringing up the topic. If it helps you to hear from the other side great!
Guess what? It helps US to hear about YOUR side. It helps me to know what the opposite side is going through and possibly come of with ways/means to improve things. I've never done heroin, but it is an opiate just like Morphine, Demerol, Oxycontin, hydracodone.Dilaudid, fentanyl-( you get the picture) De[ending on the person they get 'hooked' for various reasons....I had been taking hydros for mouth pain because I had THREE oral surgeries within a year. Yikes!
So it was legitimate pain....BUT, I didn't like when I used it all up and had no more. For me, the worst thing with detoxing is the insomnia and I had insomnia for 2-3 weeks, probably because my "baseline" is that I've struggled with insomnia for years.......Why can't I sleep, dang-it?! My body is tired when I go to bed....but sometimes my mind feels like it's having racing thoughts and I'm wide awake. It's kind of depressing to tell you the truth.
It's likely that your husband is going through some BIG changes and it's good that he so enthused about his recovery program. It looks to me from your post that you still love him despite him being a former Heroin user. That's big. Most addicts feel shame and are worried that their spouse won't love them anymore of leave when the find out the truth. They are ashamed and not proud of what they've done...so if you can come up with anything to help him not feel so ashamed that would be very helpful, I think.
I feel like I'm rambling, but I'd like to answer some of your questions when I can come up with answers...
Blessed Be
Thank you! I appreciate the other side! I do love him! Even though at times because of anger, rage, frustration, irritation it makes me feel like I hate him. I really dont. I never will. I hate the fact of what he has put me through but I just want him. I know he has so much potential that he has not applied to his life..I hope that now he can and so far he is..despite my frustrations, I know what he is doing is for the better. I know I can be a big problem and it's hard to contain my sappy feelings. I'm learning. Veryyy slowly but surely. Sometimes all the negative stuff just gets the best of me for sure. I'd love to talk to his sponsor as a mediator since his wife and me go to meetings together but then I think twice because I feel he would tell me to basically sit down, shutup, and suck it up. Harsh. Anyhow, thank you! The last thing I want to do is treat my love like I don't love him. Through the years, it sure hasn't shown all the time but I'm hoping I can improve myself to better treat myself and others around me. Especially my husband who really does deserve the world. I hate the negative feelings I have and I'm learning to be more positive and worry about myself as he is worrying about his self.