Aellyce 8+ yrs ago nearly two years sober (aa) my father had died 4yrs before 40yrs off booze aa , found out my father had being abusing my daughter since age 7- 13 and my younger brother had raped her when she was 13 yrs old .
My wife had total nervous breakdown , them my daughter same thing , I was the ''strong ''one who held it all together . Counselling for wife and daughter then I had complete breakdown , then within 2 years I was sectioned by the mental health act and hospitalized 3 times in a ''locked ward '' knives forks all plastic , mental institutions are something else . Diagnosed with Bi Polar condition , very heavy medication for a very long time .
Sexually abused as child , disfunctional alcoholic home ,, mother ''incapable ''of showing affection /love , she died 7 years ago and I was 63 years of age and ''not once ''had she ever told me she loved me , very painful emotionally .
Today I am ''drug free '' for 13 months , daughter and my wife are doing well , I am doing well . Sometimes I bump into aa members and some have said to me '' oh your father was a wonderful example '' I simply say ''no he was a dry drunk '' end of story . Been at meetings recently ,listened to someone feeling like drinking cause their''cat had died '' oh well.
I felt sorry for myself for short periods through these trying times and sometimes thought '' why me '' ''poor me '' when will this ever end ,it wasn't easy . Some smartass said to me ''why not you '' ? you know they were right ,only thing I was promised was sobriety ''nothing else '' I had to learn to rise above and move on and face life on life's terms , it isn't easy at times but acceptance is the answer to any outside problems affecting me ''personally ''.
We are all human with human feelings , me ? I had to learn to toughen up and move on in life . There is ''always ''someone worse off , take care .
Regards .
Stevie .
Sobriety date 12 03 2006 . Words are easy , music is a lot harder .