Spalding, so glad to hear from you! I am so glad that you reached out here when your Mom was declining, and I agree with you that sticking around could really help you to think through the relationship patterns you learned with your Mom. I was about your age when my own Mom had some very serious medical problems as a result of her drinking, but instead of reaching out for healthy support, I fell into drinking myself and got into a series of codependent relationships with other addicts. It was about ten years before I made my first effort to get sober, and has taken me another ten to find lasting sobriety and emotional stability. So I'm inspired by your story. I think it's great that you have been proactive in the past about taking care of yourself and totally agree that seeking out other people who are working on recovering from the effects of addiction on their lives is a very healthy step for you!! Keep coming back!