I am very sorry to hear about your friend. On the other hand I am delighted to see you are not talking about drinking, which tells me you must have made great progress in your own recovery.
I have a very dear friend in AA, the man who was the first to call me the morning after my last drink. I'll never forget his lindness and understanding. H esuffere badly from bi-polar. He never liked taking his lithium. In fact now he is dealing with kidney failure due to it. But it was a medication he had to take in order to survive.
Periodically he would try and take himself off it. As he explained it to me, that made him high, and in that state he would believe that he could drink again. I can relate in a limited way. One of my longest spells of miserable sobriety ended with a few puffs of a get high chemical, which lead to a drink in seconds.
Once he took the first drink, the combination of alcohol and the lack of medication lead to absolute chaos. He would have to go back to the mental hospital and it would take months to stabilise him. Anything could have happened in that time, but thankfully the worst consequences were avoided.
Not sure I understand the reference to guilt and shame. I came in with barrow loads of the stuff and not much else. The AA program helped me repair that damage "we will not regret the past or wish to shut the door on it". It turned my liabilities into assetts "no matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can help others" But I draw a distinction between the fellowship ( meetings) and the program (the steps).
In meetings I sometimes hear a great deal of ignorance about the illness of alcoholism, and the AA method of recovery. Blaming someone for a slip because "he chose" to take a drink, doesn't tally with the fact that alcoholics like me have lost the power of choice and at certain times have no effective defence. My Bi Polar friend understood that and he helped me find a defence. He didn't waste time berating me for something that was beyond my power to control. He showed compassion and empathy for my situation.
Guilt tripping and shaming has not been a part of my AA experience.