Originally Posted by
borgs7 
My ABF is making things so hard . I've tried and tried and these last few days has been a disaster. He doesn't want to talk about his feelings towards the holidays and his sister being sick that all he wants to do is numb himself . I feel like I've lost him again and the erratic behavior has and him calling me a bitch has taken a toll on me. I don't know what else to do . It breaks my heart .
You know what to do. You're just reluctant to do it.
And that's understandable. When we care about someone, it's very difficult to remove that person from our lives. Sometimes we may think that a dysfunctional dynamic like the one you describe above is better than the absence of any dynamic.
However, that's not true; we may a price for being in situations like this, and over time, that price becomes bigger and bigger.
Detach. With love if possible. If not, then with prejudice will suffice...