klegrand

Hi it's me Kelly, I have meet a few of you, But, this is the first time I really need to talk. I have been in recovery for 6 years and feel great But i know that the disease is always with me, and i hold the key to any exacerbations. I also stay aware that it is possible to pass this disease to my children. I have four a 21 yr. old girl I have no worries about her, But my 19 year old son Kevin scares the hell out of me then there is a 15 and 12 year old boys. With Kevin last year was a pretty rough one and then back in December he settled down and decided that he didn't want to get drunk any more and that the partying was getting old. Of course all the way his dad and I were telling him that he was predisposed to addictive behavior and reminded him of what it was like for him to watch me slither down junkie row.

Anyway, he has been doing great. He hadn't had a drink since December. He graduated last month from highschool, he is a supervisor at Walmart and enrolled in college law enforcement program. We have been so proud of him and happy for him. As well as relieved. But this morning at 4 am I got a phone call that he had been in an accident. He was driving his supervisors car is is olny 20 himself. Kev was arrested and taken to jail where he blew a 1.43. The guys car was totalled they took his license and thank god he escaped without a mark. That in it's self is a miracle the vehicle went end over end then over on it's side and then into a tree. I am freaking out for him. I want to protect him so bad from all this. He is a great guy. Smart, funny, loveable.... And we his parents gave him our disease. And what really scares the hell out of me is I know there is nothing we can say or do to make him understand. Addicts are the most stubborn head strong people I have ever known in my life. I feel he will have to learn for himself, I would like think think this is a one time deal, lesson learned!!! But, for some reason I doubt it...

Sorry for rabbling I just needed to get it off my chest. I am just scared