" I don't have much tolerance for the still drinking alcoholic today ."
I get that from most of your posts. You've gotten some good advice and starting points for how to deal with that.
My uncle was an alcoholic, too. Runs in our family. He was closest to my age of all my aunts and uncles and more a buddy than any other relative. We went through two episodes of rehab with him and whenever I saw him, drunk or sober, it was always hugs and "I'm gonna do better".
He literally drank himself to death one week.
If I could go back in time and do more to save him, I would forsake a lot of things. It would have helped me to straighten up a few years earlier.
Always offer help.