Good results, Midton! Grizzly, I really need to start running again. I used to run a lot and now I'm out of the habit. I miss it and it used to keep me in shape. Maybe just a little at a time for now to get back into it.... still doing yoga, but need some cardio, as well.
Time2Rise - I wish you well, whatever you decide.
HelpImAlive - good going. I can tell you that with me and my relapses, there is just no question of going to back and drinking again the next time. I used to be able to moderate quite well, and even intermittently in the last few years. But the last few times I have drank have all been at my house alone in my room. I seem to have zero control over the amount I drink when I do that. Last Sunday night I bought 4 tiny single serve bottles of Chardonnay, thinking I would only have 1-2 and save two for later. Well, I had the one (tasted like swill by the way), and didn't feel much so quickly went and had the second hoping for that buzz/relief. I think it hit me because I almost have no recollection of having the 3rd and 4th. I was just surprised they were gone and didn't even remember getting them to drink. I also watched a football game and had no idea who won or what happened in the 4th quarter. The 3rd quarter was really fuzzy. I also went and hid the 4 little bottles in the trash but didn't remember doing that. In the morning I was panicked because I didn't know where I put them and was afraid someone (my Mom) would find them somewhere in the house. I had to go through all the yucky trash to find them, found all 4 bottles, took them out and brought them to a public trash can (my Mom seems to find every evidence of drinking that I leave, even in the trash). Then the hangover came and I felt like I was going to die. At first early in the day my head was still foggy and I didn't know what was going on (didn't feel sober enough to safely drive, so didn't). I went back to bed and tossed and turned with nausea for a couple of hours just hoping and praying that time would go by and I would start to feel normal again. Went out around noon and brought a plastic bag in my car with me in case I had to vomit (driving in a car while hungover always makes me sick to my stomach even more), got into worked and faked being happy for a few hours meanwhile sipping small sips of Gatoraid but nothing else. Finally, around 4:00/5:00 had a little food and started to recover. For me it's just so clear cut - it's been like that 9 times out of the last 10 that I drank. Drinking is just not a safe option for me.
Now to kill those lying thoughts that tell me "just a glass of wine... won't hurt anything..."