Try to work the steps. You need to get honest with yourself and look back at your drinking. If you feel you are an alcoholic your condition is hopeless. You will never be able to live a life of moderate drinking because you aren't like other people! Us alcoholics don't have the power to moderate. We are all or nothing. If you have decided you are an alcoholic and cannot control your drinking maybe you should try to make life about more than just yourself. You can do it. Don't give up! Why continuw to drink if your going to lose?