Hi Belljar
I'm sorry to read your full story - but I know that you'll hear from others here who deal with issues in their family.
The thing to remember about drinking is it solves nothing - and the more you turn to it, the more you'll find yourself dragged down, your abilities depleted and your capacity to cope with anything, much less your children, will be drastically reduced.
I'm not going to tell you shouldn't have adopted these children - thats's noone's right here to say...but I think it's clear you need to find yourself more help and support.
Parenting is obviously a job that's testing your limits - but drinking will only deplete those limits further.
D