I'm glad you wanted to talk this over, Happiness. That's what I love about our community - you never have to feel alone, no matter what's going on.
I tried to use willpower to control what I drank for years. I was determined to not give it up entirely. I don't know why, because in the end it was nothing but stress and misery. Going through the ups & downs for decades took it's toll. I found myself drinking all day in the end. This is the time to take action - and I'm so glad you're taking a hard look at what alcohol is doing to your life. Keeping yourself distracted is smart.
You're going to do it.