Hi there plenty good, I have been wondering the exact same thing. I am 58 years old but grew up with a violent alc father, alc mother, the effects just seem to linger on. I have been to therapy and it was told to me that I have a dissociated (disconnect from self) coping style that started in my early years of being afraid of my father. It gives me great pain to write this, but I still carry much guilt as I was not the mother that I aspired to be with my 4 children. My youngest is still at home but I find I still shut down with her and withdraw into my own world. I am a little scared to go to a ACOA meeting as my life is still stuck with just going through the motions of work & daily life.."survival" which has been my way of being in the world. I want to move forward now and not stay in the past ..concerned that I will just reinforce my symptoms by going to meetings, am I too old? (I am starting therapy in 2 week, fingers crossed with new therapist!)
Also I am a recovering allergic style drinker, not daily, but enough to cause problems..mostly hidden from my family. I have deep shame around this as I never wanted to end up like my mother.