Geez, I hardly even know what to say here. Your post is outrageous in so many ways. You need help, pronto. NO ONE is responsible for your actions but YOU. No one. That whole 'blaming the wife' schtick is incredibly pathetic. I would like to say more, but that's probably not fair; you came here - theoretically - for help. You can only get help if you are willing to take it. If AA doesn't fit, try the other programs people have mentioned - I think SMART in particular is good, but Don may be right in recommending Rational Recovery.
I hope you do get help.
--anne