Yeah - I think most alcoholics can be a bit controlling at times if we don't work on it. It's a reaction to anxiety mostly. If we get fearful we try to control our surroundings. Like controlling the little things will keep everything under control. It's hard work all that - no wonder you're feeling down if you're keeping the reigns on everything.
Have you considered outside help? You know. Face to face - meetings or something? It could help. My OH didn't really like me going to AA at first. Then he realised I tended to come back a LOT more chilled. And then he saw that I was getting calmer and less depressed. Now he accepts that it's part of what I do to keep happy and on an even-keel.
I don't think you're boring or an a-hole. Probably just a little depressed and anxious. That can be sorted
