I understand it completely. My childhood was chaotic, rootless for years, lost my sister at age 4, grew up without a dad, etc. I developed emotional coping strategies and ways of thinking that no longer work as an adult.
ACA meetings might be ideal, but my therapist truly believes that the straight up AA stepwork will do the trick, even though the focus of responsibility is a little more on ourselves than on parents who made mistakes.
The result still involves changing our perceptions, letting go of control, being humble, accepting life as it really is, not distorted by our old thinking.. a lot of it also falls into the realm of mindfulness I think, which I work on a lot.