Hi there. Sorry I haven't been here for a few days. I haven't felt at all well.
I was doing so well, and everything fell apart. Since friday when I had that reaction to that effexor, I can't seem to get my anxiety under control. Things are REALLY bad. I am a basket case, I am like, in a constant state of fighting off a panic attack. I have had these in the past, but have been able to come to a point where I could control them, I so far have now been having alot of trouble controling them. Not real sure what is going on, but feeling very bad.
I am hoping and praying that I will get back to that point. I am working on that. I am going to a 12 step christian group tomorrow. I surely hope I feel well enough to go.
I'm really sorry, I don't men to seem selfish, or feeling to sorry for myself to come here, I just am having trouble doing anything right now. I am SOOOO afraid I am going to end up in a psyc. ward. I have never been to one, and don't want to go. I need to get control of this. I have been on my knees praying, and praying. I know god has a reason for everything, I just don't understand this one. I have been working very hard on my recovery, I feel like I have been thrown a severe blow. I know SS you are also so struggling, I am so sorry for that
I pray for you also. I don't meant to cut off anyone here. I will be back. I just need to gain some control here.
So, as soon as I can, I'll be back. I love you all, you have all been there to help me, and I really hope somehow I have helped some of you.
I WILL NOT USE, that I will not do. That would kill me right now. That would definatley send me away. I kow it would, that is the farthest thing from my mind. I am just going to continue to pray, and work on gaining control of my anxiety. I do LOVE you ALL!!! I am here, I am thinking of you all, even when I'm not here. Love, Becky