cricket......from what you have described....it seems that your major task (for yourself) will be setting boundaries with all the members. They will test you, for sure! They will continue to TRY to do what they have always done to you---because that is what they have learned and they believe that they CAN---and, it always worked in the past. They will stop it when they learn that it doesn't work, anymore. Actually, sometimes, it gets worse before it gets better.
The kids may be getting an education on the financial realities of the real world. There are many 16yr. olds who don't have a car (unless they pay for it).
Many people who go through college without a car (unless they get it for themselves). If I had ever asked my parents for a car....or , even the insurance---they would have thought that I was on drugs!...lol...they couldn't afford it, anyway....
I can remember a saying that my dad always used when someone was mad (because they didn't get their way)....it was--"they can stay mad until they get glad".....
And it is true---nobody stays "mad" continuously, and, forever/
sooner or later, they will find something to be glad about....
someone else"s anger does not represent a responsibility for you to make them happy!!!! Their reaction is their problem.....
Realizing this is a big part of learning to detach and set personal boundaries.....
dandylion