I don't know your relationship with your wife but if it's good and you can have honest and open conversations I'd tell her. She can be another resource to help you on this journey. I know my wife is. In my mind not telling anyone means you're leaving your option open to fail. Who will know but you if you do. Yes, you'll know you failed and be disappointed but with someone else knowing adds one more layer of protection when the av says f it. Us drunks are used to being disappointed. Disappointing someone else can help you think twice.