My friend Zac, was a case in point. Ten years sober he picked up. I went to see him thinking that with all his past AA experience it would be a simple matter to get him back to the meetings, detox etc. I could not have been more wrong.
There was nothing left of his AA experience, it was like his AA hard drive had been wiped. I even hesitate now to call this a relapse because there was no sign there had ever been any recovery in the AA sense, that is having a spiritual awakening which provided the much needed defence against the first drink.
He was a popular guy. An army of his AA friends were gathered round him, but aside from attending a meeting every week, no one knew if he had taken any other action. He did not sponsor, did not have a sponsor, never talked about the steps. He was just a nice guy to see each week at that meeting.
He never recovered. In spite of all his friends, Zac once again proved what is meant by beyond human aid. None of us could save him. He was dead in three months.
He lasted ten years, which to me was evidence that he had made a firm decision to stop for good. But he never did what he needed to do to put that decision into permanent effect.