My 2 cents worth. I am encouraged your AH is attending AA where the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop drinking. I think it means that he wants to stop but can't, the very definition of an alcoholic in the first place.
Having been in his position I know he can hear the message and will be spending a lot of time trying to figure it out.
There is a saying, "you can only hear what you can hear when you can hear it, you can only see what you can see when you can see it" One day the penny will drop and he will see what he needs to do to recover.
I wouldn't know what to do about your living circumstances. I can tell you that finding myself without friends or family or job or money really helped me to see the reality of my situation. I think you have to do what you think is best for you and your family. If you do what you believe to be right, the chances are it will help your AH as well.