Told the AW that I'm done..
After being separated since Feb I have listened to my gut feeling and told my AW that I plan to proceed with divorce. She agreed that she was also "done" with me as well. It's so insane how I put up with so much BS and how it could have been avoided. In a way I'm thankful that it did happen because it has helped me battle my self confidence demons and codependency head on. I'm in such a better place than I ever have been mentally. The improvements I've made are proof that it can be done. I have a long way to go to battle my insecurities but I'm so much more prepared today than I was even 6 months ago.
Our divorce will be uncontested and can't happen soon enough as the wife was just in a car accident that was likely related to drinking.
My declaration for myself. Always listen to my gut. If it's telling you something back off and reassess things but don't give in no matter what. I would have saved so much of my life of unhappiness if I would have left her yrs ago. All of this is time in my life that I'll never get back. That infuriates me...
Thanks for listening SR. You guys are great.