Originally Posted by Hawkeye13

I know growing up with an alcoholic parent was an extremely negative influence
on my own subsequent alcohol abuse and serious anger issues.

As long as you have another active addict in the house,
it seems somewhat unfair and hypocritical for your husband to be using
while telling your son he cannot--

This seems to be an elephant in the room--I don't mean this as hurtful,
but perhaps your son in enacting the underlying tension, pain, and anger
in the family of your husband's addiction and its negative impact on the family?