Dear Gemlitigate
My initial reaction when reading your opening post was "smart girl." I must confess a little envy for your intellect, which led you out of this relatively quickly.
I also, as usual, have gleaned something helpful from your post. I didn't realize until now that I have been burdened with shame since separating from my partner. This is probably mentioned on this site and in my AlAnon program, but until n ow I have failed to see it.
Best of luck to you in your recovery!