Originally Posted by
doggonecarl 
Sorry for your struggles. Anybody who is sober had to go through the same cravings. They may drive us crazy, but unless you are physically dependent, they are just thoughts. Thoughts can't make you drink. Only you can make yourself drink by picking up.
I don't advise putting quitting off until the 5th. It isn't going to get any easier, and the resolve you have this very moment may fade. Quit today. Right now.
Perhaps it is time to tell your husband about your problem. Support is important. And get rid of all the alcohol in your house. You can only give into your cravings if there is something to drink. With an alcohol-free home, you can't drink.
i completely understand what you are saying regarding my resolve disappearing by the 5th, but i have tried many times to quit just like that and it hasnt worked at all. i never made it past the second day. i read that having a date in mind and knowing its coming, preparing yourself for it, can work for some people so i am trying that this time.
my partner is aware of exactly how much i drink and how drunk i get every night, but he views it as 'she is just having fun. if she likes being drunk and she isnt hurting anyone, what is the harm?' he puts off worrying about my health, thinking 'it will never happen' as i usually do also. he has said a few times that i am not an alcoholic. but having never touched a drop himself and having grown up with a heavy drinking father, it is difficult for him to see what is healthy or not.