anything to help with cravings?
i have been drinking for over a decade, beginning at 15, now im 27. it has always been 'controlled', only drinking at set hours during the night, never in the daytime. i hadnt had blackouts etc. i was unhappy, certainly but with no hangovers and no daytime drinking, i continued rather than face the pain of quitting.
but in this past month, just like that, everything is spiralling out of control. i am getting drunker than ever before just by drinking more in one sitting than i ever have in the past. i have had a few blackouts. i am waking later and later and its affecting my children (aged just 8, 6 and 4) who get their own breakfast and juice in the morning before quietly playing until i awaken. i attempted to take my own life last week by way of an overdose while drunk. this overdose was simply due to the stresses of drinking/pain of quitting.
my other half is fantastic (he doesnt realize my drinking is a major problem) but i know at some point, especially if my drinking continues becoming more excessive as it has in the last month, he will leave. who wouldnt? my children will be taken from me. this has to stop.
so, next monday (5th october) i plan on quitting and just seeing it through regardless of the suffering i may feel. however, i need some aids in order to succeed. i dont have a doctor and dont really want medication anyway. i hear many people basically saying do whatever you want, just stay happy/content, eat what you like, do what you enjoy etc.
i have tried all that and all it means for me is that i have a great day doing all the things i love, eating whatever i like without worrying and then giving in and drinking at night.
the only place i drink is in my living room after 9pm. how do i avoid that? my partner goes to bed early to be up early for work so i cant stay in the bedroom. all i have every night is an empty living room, a computer and an immense craving. i cannot go out, i cannot go to another room as someone is sleeping in every room other than the kitchen, i cannot have a bath as it is so noisy it wakes everyone and i cannot sleep (it just doesnt happen). i can read, do a jigsaw, play a game, but i keep clock watching and eventually i drink, even as late as 1pm. i am utterly alone with my cravings.
i am desperate here. can anyone help?