Thank you for support, friends! Sorry to hear of these cravings and small relapses. To tell you the honest truth, I don't know how I've mustered the mind switch from "a drink sounds GREAT" to " I don't drink" ...I like to think I've hypnotized myself. When I see the alcohol in front of me, I think of how good I feel after one...I think of how I'm going to want another one...and another one to keep that initial buzz going... Then I might grab a 6 pack because I don't want to drink anymore of someone else's booze... But I'll probably drink two more, because I'll be feeling hungry but if I eat, I'll get too tired and pass out...so I'll get drunk and then my stomach will be so sick in the morning...I'll eat and eat as much greasy food and soda I can stomach...my head will be pounding...I'd probably just take a nap and hope to feel better when I wake up...and I would, but feeling better means..okay, I'll finish that 6 pack now...& the cycle will begin to repeat itself daily...& there goes my life again. Diluted with booze. I assume that's what "playing the tape" means. Trust me. It works for me for now. It's funny, though. The few people I've informed of my "abstaining " have inquired " for how long"...& I don't know how to respond....I guess for as long as I can...and if I can't, I'll try again. "if we don't change, we don't grow. if we don't grow, we aren't really living"~Gail Sheehy